A Werewolf, A Vampire, and A Fae Walk Into A Bar (Book 1 of The Last Witch Series)

I want to argue, to tell her none of that is true, but I won't insult her intelligence. I was a musical prodigy in a tiny town with no competition. It set me up to be some kind of weird local mascot. I could do no wrong. I was pretty, sure, but I wasn't AJ's level of pretty. Instead, I was the smart one with all the talent. She was the blond bombshell who filled out early. Her nickname in middle school was jailbait. Her family life was shit, so she had no support. I became her family, with my grandparents doing what they could for her. But nothing we did could shake this town from their prejudices. It's no wonder she never left John. She had nowhere else to go. I'm the only person in Rowley who's ever loved her back, and I was gone for half a decade.

So, I make a decision I hope I won't regret.

And I tell her everything.

She is completely silent through it all, the only sign that she's still listening is the occasional widening of her eyes.

When I'm done, we sit in silence for a long minute, both of us absorbing the absurdity of my tale. Saying it all out loud does nothing to make this situation sound saner. If anything, I feel like I'm in an alternate reality.

"So, Zev is the werewolf, Rune is the fae, and Darius is the vampire?" she asks, finally.

I blink. "Yes."

She nods. "Makes sense. I vibe with that."

I blink again. "You... vibe with that?"

"I mean, at first, I wasn't sure if Rune or Darius was the vampire. They both have a bit of that energy, but I for sure knew Zev was a werewolf the moment I met him."

"What the hell are you going on about?" I ask. "When you met him?"

AJ sighs, like she's trying to explain something basic to a child. "I don't know how you didn't know what they were the moment they walked into the bar, B. It was super obvious. You think I bought any part of that story about them going to a medical convention together?" She rolls her eyes. "I have read enough books and seen enough TV shows to know the real deal when I meet it. First of all, no normal men are that incredibly hot unless their last names are Hemsworth. Second, I could smell it on them."

Now my eyes are surely bugging out of my freaking skull. "You could smell it on them. AJ, what does that even mean?"

My best friend shrugs, all casual-like. "I dunno. They didn't smell human."

She glances at me sharply, her perfect little nose scrunching in disgust. "Speaking of, momma, when did you last bathe." It's not even a question, just a clear testament to my current hygiene. And she's not wrong, so I don't argue when she drags me to the bathroom and begins running the tub.

"Strip down. It ain't nothing I haven't already seen. We need to clean you up before we go deal with the mess my dead husband left."

She's so matter-of-fact about it all, I feel equally relieved and confused. Am I the only one surprised by the presence of the supernatural in our world? And what will the Sexies say when they find out AJ knows? I worry Darius will try his mind tricks with her, and no one is messing with my girl's brain if I can help it.

AJ hums as she works, adding bath salts and bubbles, and when I finally sink into the hot water, I moan in pleasure. My body truly feels like it's been put through a military boot camp. Everything hurts, and I don't even care if baths are recommended after birth or not. It feels too good to be bad for me. Plus, my new bath came with jets, which work perfectly to massage out some of my aches and pains as I soak.

AJ washes my hair for me, bless her, and once I'm done and dressed in fresh clothes, I feel like a whole new person. Ready to face whatever awaits me on the other side of my bedroom door, more or less.

Also, I need my baby back. Being apart from her is strange, after carrying her in me for so long. My body doesn't feel complete without her. I glance at the clock and see it's already afternoon. The day is slipping away, soon we'll have to light candles because it doesn't seem like the power is coming back by tonight. Thank God for the gas water heater.

I can hear the three Sexies bickering as we walk into the living room together, though the scene that awaits us is not what I'm expecting.Text © by N0ve/lDrama.Org.

"This has nothing to do with her," Rune says. He's sitting in a rocking chair holding Rain so tenderly, my heart nearly melts.

Darius and Zev are playing chess in the corner, which is strange because I thought they hated each other and I'm very certain I don't own a chessboard. It's also strange that Zev can transform from wolf to human and immediately become lust worthy again. "It certainly has something to do with her," Darius says, not bothering to look at the fae as he studies his next move on the chess board. "She died trying to sort out this prophecy, and now the three of us are here, just as she foresaw."

Darius looks over at Rune now. "You think that's a coincidence?"

Zev clears his throat. "I think we should discuss this later."

"Discuss what later?" I ask, when it's clear they won't keep talking like I'm not in the room.

"Nothing important," Zev says with a grimace. "Just digging up old bones that should stay buried."

"Speaking of bones and being buried, what did you do with..." I was about to say, the body, but I glance at AJ to see how she's doing first.

"The body," she finishes for me. "Where's that asshole's body?"

Turns out my girl is holding her shit together better than I could have imagined.

It also turns out John's body is gone. It's like it never happened. The floors are spotless, the ceiling is repaired, even the smell of burnt gunpowder is gone. The room now smells like cinnamon and apples, from something boiling in a cast iron pot over the fire. Darius, who was just sitting across from Zev, is now standing before us in a blink.

"Stop doing that," I say. "Walk like a normal person unless it's absolutely necessary."

He narrows his dark eyes, but nods. "We have handled the situation." Then he glances at AJ. "All that remains is taking care of her."

I grip AJ's hand harder. "I've told her everything. There's nothing to take care of. She's in the know and it's gonna stay that way."

Zev growls under his throat and Rune looks up from the baby, but doesn't make a move to intervene.

Darius frowns. "That won't be possible. The more people who know, the more dangerous this situation becomes for the child and you."

Before I can argue with him, his eyes begin to glow a faint silver and he speaks to AJ in a hypnotic voice. "You saw nothing and heard nothing. Your last memory is being downstairs at the bar. There was no gun shot, and you don't know what happened to your husband." AJ blinks, then begins to laugh. "Oh, this must be some vampire mind voodoo shit, right? I knew that was real. Yeah, sorry, buddy. Doesn't work on me."

Darius' face hardens and Rune chuckles under his breath.

Darius tries again. "You will forget everything that happened."

AJ shakes her head. "Sorry not sorry, dude. But A for effort."

"Looks like you've lost your touch," Rune says, amused.

Zev stalks over, his muscles flexing like he's on the prowl. He sniffs at AJ, who doesn't seem to find this weird at all. Zev's green eyes widen in surprise. "Hmmm. Seems like this one isn't human."