Forbidden Desire

I nodded and returned to taste his pink lips, feeling all the happiness in the world. The week was calm, and I was trying to control my jealousy, both of Bianca and his secretary, who sometimes called him while we were together. He made Hoojin available to me, and now every day he would take me to college, and Jason would pick me up afterward. I escaped to our room every night, and we became increasingly intimate. While our relationship was sweet, it was also very passionate. He made me feel things I had only read about in books, and in bed, he satisfied me completely.

Every day after college, we went to a different restaurant until we found an Italian one that became our favorite. We talked about everything; he told me about his day at the company, and I talked about my classes or some painting I was working on. Despite me not understanding anything about administration and him not knowing anything about arts, it was fun to see how much we tried to understand each other, and we always ended up helping each other in some way. We were laughing as I took sips of the wine filling the glass in my hands. Since it was an Italian restaurant, everything there was extremely romantic, from the decor, the music, and even the lighting. Everything was very intimate, and we were staring at each other while Jason held my hand on the table.

“I think you’re trying to get me drunk, Mr. Park.”

“Really? And why would I do that?”

He had a mischievous smile on his lips and was irresistible in a navy blue suit and white shirt.

“I don’t know, maybe you want to take advantage of me.”

I said in a sensual tone before taking another sip of the sweet and smooth liquid. He leaned in closer, slightly leaning over the table.

“I don’t need to do that. You know why?”

I waited for his answer, feeling his hand on my thigh.

“Because you’re a good girl who already does everything I want.”

“I do?”

I don’t know if it was the alcohol, but I was more uninhibited than usual today.

“You do, and you do it in a delicious way!”

His husky voice made my intimacy contract as he caressed my thigh under the table.

“So how about we go home where you can do whatever you want with me?”

“Whatever I want?”

I could see his eyes darken with desire, and I slowly ran my nails down his arm, feeling all his hairs stand on end.

“Whatever you want, Mr. Park!”

I said in a teasing tone, and he closed his eyes for a moment. When he opened them, his black orbs looked at me with hunger.

“You’re playing with fire, girl!”

“Maybe I want to get burned!”

I traced circles with my fingers on his hand, already feeling thirsty as I felt his other hand caress my thigh under the table. We were so engrossed that we didn’t notice when some men approached.

“Jason Park? From Park Industries?”

They stood next to our table, and Jason immediately let go of my hand, leaving me confused.

“Hi! Yes! You’re Mr. Hyun Lee from the new automotive company, right?”

“Yes! It’s a pleasure to meet you here. I’ve been trying to get a meeting with you for months. Would it be too much trouble if I invited you for a drink with us? Dr. Kim and his son are also with us.”

Jason didn’t look at me for a moment, just gave an awkward smile and agreed.

“No. It wouldn’t be any trouble.”

“Am I interrupting your dinner?”

He seemed to search for answers, and Jason looked me up and down as if analyzing what I was wearing and replied.

“This is Jane; she works for me.”

I could feel from his response that he didn’t mean to imply that he was on a date with me or that I was his girlfriend, or even a friend. In the end, that’s what I would always be. One of his employees. From the moment he let go of my hand, I realized he felt ashamed to be with me. I looked down, analyzing the gray dress with long sleeves that left my shoulders bare and went down below the knee, where it had some pleats, wondering what was wrong with it. Was I not presentable enough? I would never be as beautiful as Jinhee, who looked more like a model, but I don’t think I’m so bad that he wouldn’t want to be seen with me.

A movie played in my head, and I realized that in recent days, we had gone to several restaurants, but they were all a bit far from downtown Seoul. In all of them, he always asked for the most reserved table, and I thought it was so we could be more comfortable, but now I see it was because he didn’t want to be seen with me. He got up from the table to follow the other men, leaving me behind, and as I watched him walk away in slow motion, I saw him remember me and gestured with his hands for me to join them. I sat next to him, but he seemed like a totally different person, someone I didn’t know.

He didn’t look at me at any moment, and I was among several strange people. I kept my gaze scattered as they talked about business, and to be honest, I wasn’t really listening. I was totally lost in my thoughts, staring at the perfectly aligned forks in front of me, but I didn’t really see them; I just analyzed every moment we had together this week, thinking about how foolish I was to think I could be something to him beyond someone who “works” for him. I heard a voice calling my attention and saw that someone had sat in the chair to my left. It took me a while to snap back to reality until I saw Dr. Kim Hoojin in front of me trying to get my attention.

“Miss Jane?”

“Hi! Sorry! I was distracted.”

“Yeah, I noticed.”

He handed me a tissue, and I didn’t understand until I felt a tear roll down my face. I took it and wiped the tear that had rolled down; I tried to disguise it with a smile.

“Thank you! I think something got in my eye…”

He didn’t seem convinced but smiled at me anyway.

“It happens. And how’s your ankle?”

“Fine, thank you, I recovered quite quickly.”

“I’m glad to hear that.”

He seemed to think for a moment.

“You know, I was waiting for a call from you.”

He looked at me, and I looked at Jason, who despite being immersed in a business conversation, seemed to be paying attention to my conversation with Hoojin. I didn’t know what to say, so I just shrugged.

“Yeah, I ended up losing that piece of paper.”

I said simply, and he seemed to want to challenge me.

“Then lend me your phone here for a minute.”

I froze completely and stuttered.

“My phone?”

“Yeah, I’m going to write my number on it.”

I hesitated, and he looked at me before continuing.

“What’s the problem? Do you have a boyfriend?”

I looked at Jason, but he pretended not to hear anything.

“I like someone.”

“I see! Well, if you like someone and he’s not your boyfriend, then he’s an idiot. If a woman like you liked me, I would treat her like a princess.”

I smiled shyly and found a way to change the subject by asking about his patients, about the clinic, and if he liked working with his father. He was a welcome distraction and very amusing, although he flirted with me all the time, I managed to handle his flirts without being rude. After a few hours, Jason made an excuse, and we left. He paid the bill, and we went in silence to the car where, for the first time, he didn’t open the door for me; he just got into the car and slammed the door shut. I stood still for a few seconds, processing what he had done, and then got into the car, fastening my seatbelt.

He drove away, and by the fast way he was driving, I knew he was angry, but I didn’t know why, and at the moment, I didn’t even know if I wanted to know. When the knot in my throat seemed to loosen, I looked at him and saw that he had one hand on the steering wheel and the other was supporting his face with his arm resting on the window. His jaw was clenched, and we had never been silent for so long. When we arrived, he got out of the car and went up the stairs; I followed him, and when we entered the house, I realized everything was already dark. He headed to our room without looking back, and I stopped at the bottom of the stairs, watching him disappear from my field of vision; I stared at the stairs, hoping that at some point he would realize that I hadn’t followed him and would come after me, but that didn’t happen. I turned around and headed towards my old room, and heard his voice.

“Where are you going?”

I stopped but didn’t turn to face him.

“To my room.”

Silence reigned for a few seconds, and I could hear him sigh.ConTEent bel0ngs to Nôv(e)lD/rama(.)Org .

“Are you really going to do this?”

“It doesn’t seem like you want to be near me right now.”

“Do you really want to argue about this here?”

I turned around and saw him standing with his hands in his pants pockets. He looked away from me and sighed, lowering his head.

“I’ll wait for you in our room.” he stated.