The Accidental 185
Chapter
185
I'm nervous. I haven't seen Knox since he was in California to attend Rosie's fashion show. The fact that my best friend attended my wife's fashion show and I didn't proves how much of a fuck-up I am.
It's not only that, but I made him question whether my wife was safe with me or not. I spoke like an empty-headed asshole who was full of arrogance. When I got drunk while we were hanging out together, I revealed to him a side of me he had never seen. Frankly, that side was new to me. It didn't exist at college and neither did it exist before the accident.
As I look at all that I have been doing for the past few months, shame fills me. How did I allow myself to turn into that atrocious version of me?
"Hi Knox," I say when he opens the front door of his house. I'm not sure if I'm still the best man at his wedding or not. I messed up big time and I never apologized. I'm here now to do it though. He seems surprised to see me. Maybe it's because I haven't told him I will be coming. I was scared of telling him because I didn't want to hear him tell me that he didn't want
to see me.
I can't take the loss of another important person. I'm hanging by a thread.
For the past few days, that's all that I have been doing. I have been trying to fix my mistakes and pick up the mess I made. I have my doubts and sometimes, I tend to think that I have already lost everything and nothing I do will fix what I ruined, but I would rather try than keep thinking about the what-ifs.
"Hi, man. Come on in." He welcomes me into his home, which is a good start. He would have kicked me out if he was mad at me, right?
My heart is beating fast. I guess this is how one feels when they terribly mess up. I have been friends with Knox for more than seven years and it would really crush me if I lost him because of my own stupidity.
"Do you want something to drink?" he asks me, as I follow him to the kitchen.
"Just water," I reply, taking a seat on the kitchen chair.
"I'm glad that you stopped drinking," he tells me. I like the fact that Knox doesn't beat around the bush. He has been vocal about his dislike for the new terrible habit I picked. Now that I'm trying to recover, he also lets me know how he truly feels about this. "I have been sober for ten days now. I know it's not much, but I like to believe that it's a good start," I tell him, taking a sip of my water.
"You won't be sober for a month without being sober for ten days first and you gotta complete your first month before reaching your three months of sobriety. Everything counts and I'm proud of you for finally realizing that you need to act quickly," he says, managing to make me feel better about myself
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"I came here to... apologize for the way I acted when you were at my place." Apologize seems to be too small express my true intentions. "I was at a really dark place and frankly, I'm probably still there, but I'm doing my best to not give in, and I mistakingly took it out on the people I love the most, so I'm here to tell you that I'm sorry and I... understand if you no longer want me to be your best man." I'm not even sure if I'm still his best man.
Knox stares at me for a couple of seconds before he starts laughing, bending down and clutching his stomach. What's so funny about what I said?
"I'm sorry man, but did you actually think that I would stop being your friend because of that one incident? You're such a moron," he comments, taking me by surprise. Have I been overthinking?
"I thought I messed up big time," I mutter.NôvelDrama.Org: text © owner.
"You did, but it's not something unforgivable," he assures me. "Unless you're trying to back out of your duties as my best
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Chapter 185-
man." My best friend smirks, making me chuckle.
"Wouldn't dream of it," I tell him with a smile. A heavy load I have been bearing has just been lifted off my chest.
I wish it was as easy as that with my wife, but what I did to her is way worse than what I did to Knox.
"You still know nothing about Rosic?" Knox asks as the two of us head to the living room. We take a seat on the dark grey couch, and I lean back to rest my back.
"All I know is that she's okay, but I don't know anything about her whereabouts. The thing is... her birthday is in two days, and this is the first time I don't get to spend it with her." I have already bought her gift, but I don't know if she is going to accept it from me when we see each other.
I can't believe I need to wait for twelve more days to see her. I don't think I have the required patience for such an impossible task. If I know where she is, I'm going to get to her and do whatever it takes me to get her to talk to me.
"Maybe you will be able to get in contact with her before the wedding," Knox says.
I nod, hoping for that too, but for a second, his words do something to my brain.
"Sabrina is away for her bachelorette party, right?" I quickly ask and he nods, looking at me with confusion.
Quickly, I unlock my phone and view Sabrina's profile. As expected, she has posted a story. I open the story and a smile appears on my lips.
"Why are you smiling like that?" Knox wonders.
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"I know where my girl is and I'm going to travel to where she is," I say, standing up. They're all in Puerto Rico. Now that I think of it, I realize that my wife has told me before about where she planned on taking Sabrina. Was I barely paying her any attention or my mind has also been conspiring against me?
"Are you sure it's a good idea?" Knox sounds unsure.
"I will go there and ask her to talk to me. If he refuses, I will leave. I just want her to know that I'm willing to do anything to get her to listen to what I have to say. I want her to understand that I'm willing to go the extra mile for her," I explain to my best friend. "Don't worry. I won't ruin Sabrina's bachelorette party."
Sabrina is a close friend of mine and I would never want
to upset her.
Maybe if I go there, Rosie will understand what she means to me. Maybe this can be proof that she is my priority and I'm ready to do anything for her sake.
She has always been a sucker for the grand gestures she reads about in her novels. I can give her billions of them if it means that I can win her back.
My beautiful girl is worth the effort and I'm going to show her that.
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